The 19th Amendment Was A Mistake
In a recent interview with dying Yahoo News, comedian and actress Melissa McCarthy came off as very bitter and vindictive about the reception to her 2016 vehicle Ghostbusters, blaming the failure of the reboot on sexism:
“I just don’t know why people are so afraid of women. It’s fascinating to me.”
That’s right, people — read “men” — are so afraid of women that they just don’t go to see hilarious comedy movies that feature women. Flops like Devil Wears Prada, Mean Girls, three Pitch Perfects, Ocean’s 8, Bridesmaids, etc.
If this birdy daft or what, mates? Or maybe she’s just gone completely food.
I know, I’m just a fat-hating liar. Sure I am. It’s all make-believe. All of it. It’s all fake.
Ok, but that still doesn’t excuse the disgusting lie that men don’t like movies fronted by women. Shame on you, Melissa.
But She’s Not Done!
Coming back for seconds, McCarthy went on to once again mock fans of the original film, and movie fans in general, with this completely fresh and original take:
“If a movie 35 years later is ‘ruining your childhood,’ don’t blame us — you’ve got your own issues.”
They Still Don’t Get It
This kind of fingerpointing, man-blaming and mockery is exactly the reason why 2016 Ghostbusters flopped.
Besides being an unfunny movie that was almost a carbon-copy of the original, Sony Pictures, and whomever their garbage-chute PR agency was, decided to magnify the few voices of sexism among the tiny Ghostbusters fanbase as a marketing angle.
This is not Star Wars. It’s not Star Trek. It’s not even Doctor Who. The number of hard-core Ghostbusters fans would struggle to fill a small college stadium. They aren’t loud or influential enough to move the needle on a movie. Why would you care what they say?
Yet Sony, and the entire above-the-line talent from the movie, sabotaged their product by bringing anger, negativity and —most damaging — controversy into every conversation about the picture. “Sexists hate this movie” became the message.
They intentionally made it about the criticism and the “haters” as a way of holding a gun to the head of the potential audience: “Buy a ticket or you hate women.”
Remember, this is a comedy reboot, where you desperately need goodwill to succeed.
Instead of being gracious and above the fray, Melissa McCarthy was single-handedly responsible for the “40-year old virgin fanboy living in mom’s basement” meme going mainstream.
The vicious scorched-earth campaign culminated with Dan Ackroyd’s appearance on Entertainment Tonight where he accused some people who were insulting Leslie Jones on Twitter of being “active Klan or Aryan Brotherhood” that would be “voting a straight Republican ticket this fall.”
Is this the kind of divisiveness you want surrounding a comedy? Is it more or less likely to attract families with young children? You girls who are into the “science”?
Contrast this with how the women from Ocean’s 8 dealt with questions of sexism and backlash. Instead of “fighting back/standing up/speaking out” against the undefeatable straw-man of perceived sexism, they made it about celebrating womanhood.
Take particular note of the always classy Sandra Bullock, as she recognizes the difference between marketing a fun, heist movie and marketing Who’s Afraid Of Virginia Wolfe — she immediately self-corrects mid-interview. That’s smarts.
Then again she’s not fat-stupid. None of those women are.
It worked. People went to see it and went back to see it. They loved it. It was a hit.
Low Dog, you were wrong this time.
This Is The Truth. Not Narrative!
Don’t take my word for it. Redletter Media did an in-depth analysis that pretty much supports all of the points of this article. Remember this is science, ladies.
And don’t you wub da science? You Fucking Love Science, right?
The Path Forward
Well, first, McCarthy could mix in some salad and cardio. Even a daily ten-minute walk goes a long way to reprogramming the fat-mind.
Then maybe she could try meditation, which has been shown to raise your IQ by 25%. And that’s huge. The difference between 100 and 125 is a difference of about $3.4 million in lifetime earnings and an increase in lifespan of around 6 years.
But I guess if you’re making $12 million a year and waking up at 4:30 AM to watch Knight Rider and The Incredible Hulk (of course ?), then you’re not taking advice from some shut-in with a website.
That leaves us only one option:
