Big Surprise

This is the social justice droid from Solo: A Star Wars Story we are talking about here.

God knows what other attention-hungry, psycho feminist stuff this broad has done.

We here at Film Goblin obvious had our suspicions, but now Daniel Craig has confirmed that Phoebe Waller-Bridge was hired to rewrite No Time To Die because she’s a woman.

Right & Correct™

In an interview with The Sunday Times, Craig was asked whether the hiring of this hero to cosmopolitan entertainment bloggers was a move toward making Bond more diverse and more female-friendly.

Craig responded:

“Look, we’re having a conversation about Phoebe’s gender here, which is fucking ridiculous. She’s a great writer. Why shouldn’t we get Phoebe onto Bond?”

Hollywood to Honest translation:

“Yes.”

That’s right, Dan. Two scoops. Two terms. Two genders.

But Craig wasn’t finished telling us how bad diversity is!

“I know where you’re going, but I don’t actually want to have that conversation. I know what you’re trying to do, but it’s wrong. It’s absolutely wrong.”

Hollywood to Human translation:

“You are absolutely correct but I can’t say that.”

Yes, Danny. Only one gender should make Bond happen.

He then did the Hollywood thing that all Hollywood people do: just the greatest person to work with, the most talented, so laid back, etc:

“She’s a fucking great writer. One of the best English writers around. I said, ‘Can we get her on the film?’ That’s where I came from! I had my eye on her ever since the first Fleabag, and then I saw Killing Eve and what she did with that and just wanted her voice. It is so unique — we are very privileged to have her on board.”

Hollywood to Bond fan translation:

“This is not something I wanted. This is not something I asked for. I wanted David Mamet and Stephen Knight but at the end of the day, I’m only the actor. You take away these cameras and I go back to picking olives, mate.”

We’ve heard enough of the bullshit too…

Whenever someone snaps like that in a professional interview, starts cursing, becomes belligerent, you know damn well that the interviewer hit a nerve.

And the inference is crystal clear: No Time To Die is absolutely going to fuck fans in the ass with disgusting feminist politics and gender trespassing.

This has already been decided.

We are only left to determine the exact length, width and depth of the shaft.