HardStyle: Put That Can Of Estrogen Down and Let’s Talk SCOTCH

August 17, 2018

Hola,

Lord Garth Aqui, Welcome to HardStyle

Today we begin a new chapter at Film Goblin where we will dispel the stereotypes that geeks are a bunch of government-check cashing, hideously obese, beardo freaks sucking down Mountain Dew and Hot Pockets like Jabba on a bulking cycle.

Sure, judging by the volume of grotesquely fat, cosplay Jedi and Klingons there’s quite a few of the stereotype out there. But I have found that there are just as many if not more with actual higher-paying jobs, eclectic interests, extravagant tastes and the disposable income to enjoy both Voltron and a perfectly grilled filet mignon.

And especially here where I’ve been proud to come to know the best people — simply the finest assortment of ladies and gentlemen — all fascinating souls, each with a story to tell. We have world travelers, artists, cooks and all sorts of wonderful goblins that I hope will share their passions and experiences. As I said: the best.

So let this be the day ~~when we draw swords together~~ when we begin to explore some of those finer things together.

We will be discussing fine dining, cooking, travel, fitness, tech, guns, cars and lounge games, amongst other topics. But to begin with, we are gonna discuss booze.

Specifically my passion: Scotch.

Scotch Whiskey

There are many types of whiskey around the world with some of the finest right here in the good ole U.S.A. But I’ve only ever loved Single Malt Scotch whiskey.

Let me preface this by saying, much like wine, there are many really expensive bottles and I’ve been fortunate to have tried some insanely expensive shit but I’m generally just as happy with labels in the $50 to $100.00 range. The labels we will be discussing will generally fall into that range.

Let me also say I consider myself a rather light drinker.

I may only have three pours a week. I savor them and in a lot of instances I’ll pour a glass, chill out before bed and write articles for the site. I don’t drink to get drunk, never have. If you want to get hammered there are a lot more economical ways to do so than a $50 plus bottle of scotch whiskey. With that said, the booze…

True Single Malt Scotch comes from 6 regions of Scotland:

For the purposes of this article, we will be focusing on three regions. Islay, Highland and Speyside.

Islay

My personal favorites are from the Islay region. They are Briney and very peaty with the taste of the sea, characteristic of the island region from which it comes. Laphroaig, Bowmore, Bruichladdich and are a few of the distilleries you may be familiar with.

Most won’t cost a fortune, Laphroaig 10, for example, is typically at Costco at under $40. I’ve bought Bowmore 15 at Costco for $70 and it’s fucking amazing.

To me, this region is the most flavorful. It’s just flat out the most interesting on the palate. If House Greyjoy bottled whiskey it would taste like this.

Speyside

My second favorite region would most definitely be the Speyside region.

Speysides include Macallan, Glenfiddich and Balvenie. I’m not really a fan of Macallan except their more expensive refined batches but I do love Balvenie and Glenfiddich is sort of tried and true old reliable that can be found in most restaurants, hotels and airport lounges across America. Speysides are either light and grassy or sweeter and spicier. Balvenie makes a 14-year-old aged in rum casks which tastes like rum butter cookies. It’s fucking amazing. Costco also has a Speyside 18 port finish from their house Kirkland line for $60 that’s a favorite of mine.

Highland

Highland single malts are quite diverse and tend toward woody flavors with notes of dried fruit and smokier palates. This region actually makes up the largest geographical area of the 6. Oban, Glenmorangie and Glendronach are some of the more familiar labels. Costco usually has Oban 14 at a pretty good price. It’s hard to recommend one to give best represent the Highland malt as they are truly diverse compared to Speyside and Islays. I do enjoy Oban for the price and availability.

The Mystical East

I should note that two regions not remotely near Scotland we did not discuss that are churning out some of the worlds finest single malt whiskeys are actually Japan and Taiwan.

Even many died-in-the-wool Scotsmen would admit that the Japanese are distilling some magical shit. We may do another article on these in order to do them justice but if you see a bottle of Hibiki, Yamazaki or Hakushu 12 buy them. They are perfection and selling for big money on the grey market.