Aannnnd we’re back.

I really hoped last week’s episode was not an aberration but alas. We’re back to crap storytelling and crap ideas. It all revolves around Seth McFarlane’s creation of the Moclans and they being the stand-ins to push his SJW bullcrap.

Before we get into that, we have the side story where Kelly breaks up with character who’s name I couldn’t be bothered to learn. For those that don’t remember, he’s a schoolteacher on the Orville. She’s just not feeling it, which is fine. But somehow it devolves into him taking offense that she thinks his job is not as important as hers, which she vehemently denies.

To which I’m thinking “Hell yes her job is more important. She has to keep an entire ship safe and make life and death decisions and you get to put gold stars on a paper when a kid spells ‘Cat’ correctly.” I’m so sick of people with useful, but really not THAT difficult, jobs pretending they are landing men on the moon or something.

The rest of the episode is him acting (off camera) really beta-male and pathetic and then showing up at the end of the episode to tell Kelly he’s putting in for a transfer. So that obstacle is done and Mercer and Kelly can get back together. What a waste of time that was.

We did get the giant talking flower he gave her that was voiced by Bruce Willis. So there was that, I guess.

This is the most effort I’ve done in decades!

But let’s get to the excrement. Locar is a Moclin who comes on board to help them upgrade their shields. Which they test in a live fire exercise and don’t get me started on the stupidity of that. Lokar tells the new security chief, Talla that he is attracted to her. This is taboo for Moclens to be attracted to the opposite sex. Klyden, Botus’s mate, approaches Loclar and tells him he knows all about his perversions. You see Bortus and Locar used to date before he married Klyden. I guess all Moklons know each other.

No you have to finish your dinner before we can go persecute the perverts.

Next thing you know, Locar is killed and the rest of the episode is finding the killer. Except you know if you’ve ever watched Star Trek that Locar isn’t dead, he’s just faking to get away. It’s very much like the TOS episode “Court Martial” where Kirk is accused of killing a crewman due to negligence only to find out he was alive the whole time.

Locar’s plan was to fake his death, blame Klyden, then slip away at the next outpost. Talla won’t let him get away with that because Klyden would be wrongly accused. She does suggest he request asylum which he declines because he says can’t do more hiding. Oh I guess it’s ok if you’re putting someone you don’t like in jail for the rest of their lives but to do it through proper channels is somehow dishonorable. You can’t have it both ways, Seth.

Here’s the problem with the Mokklaans — if no one else can be bothered to figure out the spelling, neither will I, at this point I’m ready to call them the “Hamfistians.”

The race is unisexual. They do mate to create offspring but there is no male or female of the species. There is just Moclens. The whole idea of dual-sexes is as foreign to them as the idea of 3 or more sexes would be to us. It’s not something we can conceive of.

Another Moclin episode Seth?
Shut your hole, you’re getting paid.

And yet in one episode, they had a female be born. How? How is that possible? The whole point of the sexes is for procreation and all feminine and masculine traits are born out of that. The Moclens look male to us because of our own perceptions of the world. It’s a meaningless term to them.

AND YET they have a whole prejudice around being attracted to the opposite sex. Why? How would they even develop this? Why would a space-faring species be so backward? They couldn’t work in our society. It’s like asking an ISIS member to just be a bank teller and pay his taxes.

Of course, we know why.

It’s McFarlane’s stand-in for Christians. How backward and close-minded they all are. It all falls apart once you start asking questions because he didn’t think this out.

I also wonder how the gay community reacts to seeing what they might perceive as a gay couple (even though they really aren’t, as we know it) being portrayed like crazy southern Baptists. It is a bit satisfying to see these identity groups eat their own.

A hamfistian. (Left) Note the look of hate in his eyes.

The reason why last week’s episode worked so well was that it was about two individuals trying to make an unconventional relationship work, Claire and Isaac. They weren’t representing some aggrieved identity group. It was just about them. In the end, we are all just individuals and the stories should reflect that.

When they do, they have strong stories.

When they don’t, we get these wearying, ham-fisted, and insulting Mocklannnn episodes.