In Clint Eastwood’s latest movie, The Mule he plays an old, deadbeat florist that is broke and hated by his entire family, except for his granddaughter played by Vera Farmiga’s “sister”. Clint plays this character like a cross between the character he played in Honky Tonk Man and Peter Sellers in Being There.

Clint is disgusted by the Rotten Tomatoes score for this flick.

To help pay for his granddaughter’s wedding Clint takes a job as a drug mule, but it takes him about 5 runs before he figures out that is what he’s transporting.

Prior to that, he is in blissful ignorance driving from place to place while getting paid several thousand dollars per trip by nice Mexican guys covered in tattoos and carrying guns.

When he does find out what he is transporting he doesn’t care at all because the money is great and he is living like Peoria, Illinois answer to Fredo Corleone.

Did Vera’s mother have her when she was 8 years old?

Clint starts his first run by driving a beat up old Ford truck and by the second run he has a brand-new Lincoln to use for his mule work. He uses the money from subsequent runs to pay the mortgage on his farm, pay off the bills at the local VFW and reopen an ice skating rink down the street.

Clint falls in love with the mule lifestyle and feels like a big shot while eating ice cream sandwiches and having 3 ways with women young enough to be Vera Farmiga’s “sister”.

Soon Bradley Cooper’s G-Man is on the case but since Clint is such a doddering, old fool he goes unnoticed because nobody would suspect him as being the top drug smuggler for cocaine in the USA.

By the end of the movie, Clint makes amends with his family, pisses off the cartel and is finally caught by the FBI.

Overall, I liked the movie a lot, with a big caveat: I didn’t like the way Clint’s character was written. I get that they were going for a guy that wants to have fun in the twilight of his life, but often he came across as an old dipshit instead.