Another Day, Another English Hero Replaced

Yesterday it was Sir Gawain who fell victim to the enrichment of diversity, today we witness a brave, new take on Charles Dickens as Searchlight Pictures gives us Dev Patel as the title character in The Personal History Of David Copperfield

In case you are wondering if this is some new, modern riff on the 19th-century classic, the true title of the Dickens’ serialized novel is The Personal History, Adventures, Experience and Observation of David Copperfield the Younger of Blunderstone Rookery (Which He Never Meant to Publish on Any Account).

And you thought the Birds Of Prey full title was a mouthful.

The Personal History Of David Copperfield re-imagines Charles Dickens’ classic ode to grit and perseverance through the comedic lens of its award-winning filmmakers — giving the Dickensian tale new life for a cosmopolitan age with a diverse ensemble cast of stage and screen actors from across the world. Emmy® winners and Oscar® nominees Armando Iannucci (Veep) and Simon Blackwell (Succession) lend their wry, yet heart-filled storytelling style to revisiting Dickens’ iconic hero on his quirky journey from impoverished orphan to burgeoning writer in Victorian England.

These fucking clowns actually described a Charles Dickens’ novel as “Dickensian.”

And, as you can see, they are basically Hamiltonizing David Copperfield:

I’m pretty sure Dev Patel would have been a servant or beaten on sight in polite 19th-century English society, but perhaps, with time, dumb children will actually believe the past was just as much of a multicultural paradise as their dystopian present, so they will stop dwelling on slavery and colonialism.

Of course, that’s something too good to be true, as Dev Patel next feature will surely be 12 Years A Sherpa.

What is the Indian population of England? It can’t be over five or ten percent, can it? More like three. Is there a huge market for small English language films with Indian leads on the Subcontinent? Maybe, Slumdog Millionaire brought in $7 million from 400 theaters in 2008, and there are four times as many theaters now. 

Plus, the way the trailer plays almost makes it seem like a goofy Bollywood production.

But I think the motivations are more nefarious.

See, Englishman, they aren’t just going to replace you in your own stories, myths and history, they going to continue to lay all the ills of the world at your feet for what you, and likely none of your ancestors, had anything to do with.

Then they will replace you with a more malleable population. In reality.

And they think it funny